Settle in everyone, this may take a while as there’s plenty to update in Emmyland.

Last week Amazing one and I were on vacation in lovely San Francisco. It was nothing less than perfect all week there, with temp’s in the 70’s and not a cloud in the sky. The food was good, the company was good and the city was beautiful. Were it not for the 800k homes I could totally live there.

Of course though we did fly out there, and that means a lovely trip thru the ever changing security at the airport. For the first time I actually had things confiscated from my carry on items. A tube of lipgloss and a bottle of nailpolish. They pulled my purse off the xray belt and went thru it all to get to those evil bad liquid items and then nicely explained while they were adding them to the already overflowing bowl of other peoples cosmetics that these would have been allowed had they been in a clear 32oz plastic baggie. Huh, so nailpolish loose in purse - bad. Nailpolish in ziploc baggie in purse- ok. Makes perfect sense to me. Upon arrival in SanFran we were in the shuttle on the way to the hotel and the news on the radio was talking about how that particular day they’d done tests on airport security and an unprecidented number of people had been able to slip guns and weapons past TSA employees all over the country. Well perhaps if they weren’t quite so busy searching my purse taking my $3 lipgloss and then running the purse thru the explosives trace tests they’d have been more focused on the people who actually had things a little more likely to cause issue on a plane. But I bet those TSA agents wives and girlfriends have a great collection of beauty products at home.

We did have a “celebrity” sighting while out there. Amazing one and I were sitting in a mall in SanFrancisco waiting for the very good steak resturaunt to open- I spose cause it’s Cali they put high class resturaunts in malls, it makes perfect sense too. Next thing we know the elevator doors open across from us and out pours several mall security gaurds protecting none other than FlavaFlave and his “posse” who were apparently in the mood for the sushi place next to the steak place. I have to say that in person he’s short and really old looking. But he had on his full Flava gear complete with clock round his neck glasses and hat. After all if he showed up to a mall without these things you’d never know he was anyone important. I was a little saddened because he was travelling sans any ho’s. He’s got a whole show about being surrounded by ho’s and he can’t even bring one or 12 to dinner? It was interesting though to see the sushi place actually kick people out of the resturaunt so that they could close off a section for him though.

Our flight home Sunday was uneventful, I had no nailpolish or lipgloss left to set off those on the ball security guys, so we flew thru security like a breeze. Then Monday pm amazing one FINALLY got to close on his house. Oh the joy, I’ve never been so happy to see something go away (except for a few old boyfriends ;))

While he was busy with closing I got to see my neighbor set himself on fire. I will never ever ever understand why people insist on pouring half a friggen bottle of lighter fluid on their grills. This guy was primed for YouTube. 1) The grill is on his front stoop, not in the driveway, or even on the sidewalk, it is on his stoop. 2) He has doused the damn thing in flammible liquid. As soon as he lights it it flares up and catches his sleeve on fire. That’s when he starts flappin his arm around cause everyone knows when you’re on fire that’s what you do. When he sees that this particular tactic isn’t working so well he pulls his shirt out and starts stomping it out on the ground. The best part is that the flame at it’s highest point was no more than a foot below his roof overhang. If he’d managed to set himself AND his house on fire I think he would have been eligible for some type of award.